Warning: The Side Effects of Parenting

The Von Ohlen Team Port St. Lucie

We all know the positive, absolute joyful side of being a parent. But what if parenting came with an FDA Approved warning label, similar for pills, with all the possible side effects you could experience? What would it say? Here’s how mine would read…

Warning, may cause:

  • extreme permanent drowsiness
  • silly dancing and singing at random times
  • battles at meal time
  • development of ninja skills
  • excretion of bodily fluids other than your own
  • constant memory loss
  • random disappearances of household items
  • sudden interest in drinking alcohol every evening, and afternoon, and morning…
  • comparison and irrational judgement of other parents
  • weird addiction to Peppa Pig and Paw Patrol (even after kids are in bed)
  • unfounded hostility toward in-laws
  • renewed appreciation when spouse returns home
  • random confiscation and destruction of mobile devices
  • compulsive use of birth control
  • Awful headaches featuring stuck-in-your-head kids songs
  • Annoying habit of talking to everyone like they’re 2
side effects of being a parent

Ollie looks exactly like his father did when he was a toddler!

Just like real pills from the pharmacy, there are always a ton of side effects. However, unlike those pills, being a parent is totally worth the risk and side effects. Plus you can’t get something great without putting in great work and sacrifice right…….right? I wouldn’t trade my cute little demon spawn (just like his father) for anything in the world! What would your FDA parental warning label look like? Please feel free to comment and thanks for reading!

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