How to Survive your Toddler at the Toy Store

Ollie shoppingNow listen up soldier. This is a straight forward, clear-cut operation. Stick to the plan and you’ll make it back. Any deviation and you could wind up in the infirmary, or worse. The enemy is quick, he is cunning, and he acts without logic. He will not hesitate to take you, or anything he can get ahold of, down. Here’s the plan.

  • Make sure your little warrior is fully briefed on why they’re there and what to extract on your mission.
  • Include items in your military gear to keep your little warrior distracted during the downtime between battles.
  • Always pack plenty of rations and continue to remind your little soldier the objectives of your mission as the mind wanders during extreme survival situations.
  • Having both Generals on deck to command soldiers is always better than one.
  • Make sure to know your evacuation route and extraction point just in case the diaper hits the fan.
  • If your little soldier starts to go nuclear, it’s time to hit the shelters.

Some of you might be thinking this is a suicide mission. So let me remind you that you cannot achieve greatness without great risk. You have what it takes so get out there and do it!

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